The Evils of Hippie Women

When asking myself what to share for my first post I was struck with an idea from a fellow "Customer Service Representative". You see, I work in an amazing call center where I actually get PAID to listen to people complain and moan about the ridiculous prices we are charging for our services. By services I of course am not talking about the inappropriate kind. Dirty minded people....

Regardless, to keep myself from wanting to hang cute stuffed animals from the blinds in front of my cubicle (See picture)



I resort to having lengthy conversations with my co-worker on his dating exploits and occasionally the fantastic plot for the next great american novel (I.E. NOT Twilight) which would spawn from aforementioned stories. To my great joy the subject of hippie women abounded! I like to call myself a connoisseur of all that is hippie and loves to roll around in dirt, so of course when he asked for my advice on a dating matter involving his lovely hippie friend I was quick to put in my two cents.

My dear co-worker seems to be in quite a sticky situation. He is currently semi/quasi/faux/almost ready to commit/dating a girl that he claims to be quite fond of. I find this hard to believe simply because he abhors any sort of conformity and let's face it, what non-conformist would give in to having a girlfriend?! GASP!
ANYWAY... so he claims he likes this girl/woman/shething (we will call her shething)
and obviously shething likes him back because shething brought up the "DTR" ######DISCLAIMER FOR ALL THE NON-MORMONS - "DTR" refers to "Define the relationship" it is a lovely conversation that happens between two people when they are ready to take the next step! and by next step I mean boyfriend and girlfriend... again you pervs #########

Enough of my rambling - point blank they like each other.
Said co-worker IM's me today stating that he received a "naughty text" from one of his recently separated hippie friends. She is young, cute, hippie, and apparently very *ahem* randy? She wanted to meet him to "talk and hang out" and he wanted to know if this was an obvious sign of a booty call.

1.) Seriously? SERIOUSLY? Guys can NOT be that stupid... OBVIOUSLY this is a booty call.
2.) Props to Hippie chick for making the first move... I like my women strong ;)
3.) DON'T CHEAT DON'T CHEAT DON'T CHEAT!!!!

My dear friend... YES this is booty call. His reply... "Well, should I let her know that I am kinda seeing someone or would that be implied if I just tell her I have to be somewhere later?" Response "Well, do you like hooking up with hippie chicks, because that's what you're about to do"

Co-worker: "I can resist her, but should I tell her I am seeing someone"
Catelin: "You can't resist a hippie"
Co-worker: "I can resist her... she only wants to get a drink and hang out, plus she has a husband (technically)"
Catelin: "No, you can't resist hippie women. You don't understand the seductive nature of hippie women... they will OWN you"
Co-worker: "ok well... then maybe from the get go I will just ask HER for relationship advice, that should be clue enough"
Catelin: "Yeeeaaaaahhhh... you're dealing with a separated hippie that probably hasn't had any in a while... she wants some obviously and you think by slightly referring to another relationship that is going to deter her from attacking you and using her hippie seductress powers on you?"
Co-worker: "right... maybe I should stay away from hippies... I mean first you sit over there with you hippie seductress ways and basically make my life hell and then this chick is asking me over for drinks... right ima stay away from hippies"
Catelin: "good idea"

Moral of the story - The evils of hippie women are inescapable... they will get you. Who can resist barefoot, tan, hair blowing in the wind, beautiful free spirited women? NOT I!... well I can because I don't roll that way. BUT! If a hippie asks you over for drinks... JUST SAY NO! PERIOD. (besides no one likes absinthe anyway ;D )

Peace Out.

P.S. Next post.... WORLD DOMINATION!